Good Question

Sorry. It's not that I'm obsessed with Grand Theft Auto, or that I don't care about other things going on. Well, it's closer to the latter, actually. I am getting sick of this primary. And I know, I know, it's great that everybody gets to vote and yadda yadda, but the Democratic candidates have been spending millions of dollars to beat each other up, and there's no recuperation period before the actual election. The longer this goes on, the easier it is for McCain to slide by. That's what I see happening. I think Democrats have vastly underestimated McCain's electability. The press has buffed him to a glossy sheen, and Obama and Clinton are looking mighty scuffed.

So anyway, this interview, via GamePolitics.com, cheered me up. Phil Villarreal, film critic for the Arizona Daily Star, spoke to Dan Isett of the Parent's Television Council, yet another group spreading misinformation about Grand Theft Auto IV in an attempt to ride the wave of free publicity.

Villarreal: Have you played the game?

Isett: I’ve actually played ‘Grand Theft Auto IV,’ and it’s right in keeping with previous versions. The series continues to lower the bar and this is the first game that has an alcohol content warning. You get points for driving drunk in this game.

Villarreal: You know that’s not true, right? The game doesn’t have points.

Isset: If nothing else, it’s a rewarded activity. Necessary for advancement.

Villarreal: I don’t think so.

Isset: But there’s an alcohol content warning and a scene of drunk driving, correct?

Villarreal: Yes. Did you play that part?

Isset: No, no. I didn’t get that far.

Villarreal: Are you a gamer at all? Do you play any games these days?

Isset: I enjoy video games.

Villarreal: What do you play?

Isset: I have a lot of fun. I play all sorts of games. I actually have a Wii.

Villarreal: What were the circumstances that you played “GTA IV?”

Isset: I rented it at a friend’s house. I think that what’s important is it’s a horrifically violent game and if you want to quibble about extra points being granted, fine. It rewards every antisocial behavior.

Awesome. Anybody who actually plays video games can easily answer the question "What do you play?" without stumbling all over themselves. "I actually have a Wii" is exactly the answer you'd expect from someone who has no idea what they're talking about. Starting that sentence with "I actually" immediately betrays your own incredulity that an adult would want to own a Wii. For future reference, in case Dan Isset or any other nongamer who needs to claim to be a gamer to retain credibility is asked this question, here's a crib sheet on how an actual game enthusiast might answer the question "What do you play?"

Well, I'm a sucker for RPGs, both Western and Japanese styles. I like action games as long as they have an intriguing story behind them, and of course nothing beats having some people over for a good party game like Mario Kart, Smash Brothers or Rock Band. I have an Xbox 360 and a Wii hooked up in the living room, three networked high-end PCs, a Playstation 2 in the bedroom for late-night retro sessions, and a PSP and DS for when I'm on the go.

"I actually own a Wii," is pretty easily interpreted as, "I don't know what I'm talking about, but let me throw out a product name I know of. I assume that will adequately convey my mastery of the subject matter."