Criticizing Tone

I really do enjoy a lot of the content at Shakespeare's Sister. However, there are obviously things I take issue with as well. More so than any of the other feminist blogs I read on a daily basis. I'm not entirely sure why this is, or if it even has a simple reason that one can point to and say, "Oh, yeah, that's it." It just is.

I was recently taken to task for suggesting that the tone of a post regarding Wil Wheaton was just as bad, and in some ways worse, than the original Wheaton post was. The tone was strident and condescending and infantilizing and exaggerated right up to the edge of dishonesty. Though I have no doubt anger was the driving force behind these attributes, I didn't really criticize the post for being too angry. That's too simplistic an argument. But I can see making that argument. I'm not even sure I'd agree, but I can understand making the argument just as well as I can understand the anger that fueled an irresponsible post in the first place.

What pisses me off, then, are blanket statements like these, meant to bully progressives into quietly accepting things that don't sit right with them:

If you are a genuine ally to feminists/womanists, you will never, ever, criticize a feminist/womanist's tone for being "too angry."

Now, I don't think this is aimed at me specifically. I don't rate high enough to warrant more than a few crass insults. But it could just as well be. And whether it's accurate or not - that is, whether I have or would criticize a feminist's tone for being too angry - is irrelevant; it's insulting and bullying to anyone who might not appreciate a tone 'so angry' that it causes the feminist in question to exaggerate the truth, make unwarranted personal attacks or alienate vital allies. I would never blame a feminist for being angry. I'm angry too. Misogyny and sexism piss me off on a daily basis, as do racism, homophobia, xenophobia, and any number of other forms of cultural bigotry. But to say that one's tone is above scrutiny is arrogant and wrong-headed.

Progress is dependent on people who get angry, because anger—productive anger, motivating anger, directed anger, rational anger—is the root of all progress.

No. Progress is dependent on people who get angry and who know how to focus that anger into persuasive arguments and cultural paradigm shifts. Anybody can manage to work up a temper. But nobody ever made progress by alienating the people who most wanted to see them succeed. I frankly don't care if you want me as an ally or not. I don't fight for feminism for you or for your insular clique. I do it because I believe it's right, and as a principle it's worth fighting for. But don't deign to tell me what I can and can not criticize. Attempting to regulate what can and can not be scrutinized is the last resort of an autocrat, not an intellectual, and certainly not a progressive.

Disapointment All Around

Nothing is quite as face-palmingly irritating as two bloggers I respect making asses of themselves in some sort of clumsy battle of wills against each other.

Wil Wheaton started it with his "hillary clinton: the psycho ex-girlfriend of the democratic party" blog post. Wil's a good guy, he has admirable politics, and I really respect that he, pretty much all by himself, acts as the American celebrity advocate for voluntary nerdiness. This blog post wasn't nearly as awful as it's been made out to be, but it isn't in particularly good taste either. Wil could have, and should have, done better.

Zuzu, the newest addition to team Shakesville, responded with a ham-fisted overreaction. While Wil was a bit harsher on Clinton personally than I can comfortably condone, his post wasn't misogynist or sexist in nature. It was a poorly-titled screed about the fact that Clinton staying in the race is bad for the Democratic Party. It didn't really have anything to do with her gender outside of the title. But Zuzu turned it into some sort of diatribe about how women aren't allowed to be ambitious, which it clearly wasn't. She also used that ridiculous, condescending pretending-to-be-sweet thing that drives me up a fucking wall, calling Wil "pumpkin" while implying he's a dick. Wil's a pretty easy target, as far as celebrities go. I'm not impressed that Zuzu decided to take him on at all, but even less so that she obviously takes advantage of his status as an outsider to condescend to him.

So Wil updated his post, and didn't help matters by doing so. Somebody should point out to him that you can't tell people what they can and can't be offended over. It never goes over well. His point is valid... the original post did not reflect misogyny, but calling people humorless is never a convincing form of self defense. It did come off as flailing... kind of.

Zuzu, as one might expect, reacted with mocking derision to Wil's piss-poor attempt to explain himself, managing to come off as twice the dick Wil did in the first place. She goes back to feigned sweetness, which, again, is way, way worse for your argument than flailing is. Seriously, don't call someone "hon" while arguing with them. It's a cowardly tactic, it's condescending, and it makes you look like an idiot. Stop. She also loses by completely misrepresenting what Wil said, out of quotes but meant to look like a quote, when she says, "Wil then tries to say that, sure, he called Clinton a bitch, but that's because she acts like one, so it's all okay!" Wil never called Clinton a bitch, Wil never admitted to calling Clinton a bitch, and it's a totally unfair, Republicanesque tactic to make it sound otherwise.

So Zuzu wins the "Who's The Biggest Asshole In A Room Full Of Assholes" competition, for employing the absolute worst form of condescending infantilization and gross misrepresentation. Congratulations.

The real point is, these two people should be allies. I guarantee that they both hate John McCain more than they love Barak Obama and Hillary Clinton, respectively. So why are they at each other's throats? Because Democrats, liberals, and progressives have lost all sense of perspective. We seem to have forgotten who the enemy really is. So keeping splitting us up by engaging in these stupid arguments. We'll see how well that works for us in November.